I Didn’t Know I Had a Dad

Today, I’ve been reflecting on my 1st Father’s Day with my dad at the age of 37.  Yes, 37.   To keep it 100,  Father’s Day can be joyous occasion for the wonderful men in your life or a highlight the absence of one.  Keep reading to hear my story on both below (trigger warning).

I grew up without my dad being present. The beginning of my life, I didn’t know I had a father. Like I thought only special or lucky kids had one. Then I learned that I did have one. So if I had one, where TF was he?!!

Long story short, he was with his family.

In my college years, he tried to build a relationship.  I was an adult at this time and I was good on him.   I still have never celebrated a “Father’s Day”.  And why would I.

Years go by of me leaving my life and occasionally answering calls from my dad on my birthday or Christmas…. it depended on how I felt that year.

When is was in my late 30s and expecting my second daughter, he called me to tell me his wife passed away.   At first I didn’t know what to do with that information.  I told him I was sorry for his loss and got off the phone.

I kid you not, God spoke to me as clear as day and said “Be a daughter to your dad”.  I cried like crazy.  Like what… I don’t know this man.  What am I supposed to do?

I live in Atlanta and my dad was in Chicago.  Would you believe that I already had a flight booked to Chicago during the time of the funeral!  Since I was already going to be in town I followed God’s orders and decided to go to the service, pregnant and all.  I was met with sideeyes and whispers but I was there, being a daughter.

The day after the funeral, I get a call from my dad asking if he could see me.  I tell him yes.  He comes to my hotel and I bring my oldest daughter Peyton down with me, who he has never met.   We go to his car and I introduce him to my daughter.   She’s 4 at the time, bopping all over the place in the back seat while we were talking.  Then out of no where he starts talking about how he’s sorry for never being there for me and he’s proud of everything I’ve accomplished.  He asked me to forgive him.  WHEW….

I mailed off my first Father’s Day card that year. Two years later, my dad passed.

I know this is crazy deep but I know there is someone out there with a similar story or contemplating reconciliation.  Take it to GOD!  

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