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Bipolar disorders

“Exercise will make it better”

I have an invisible illness. You look at me, and you see a fat, sweaty, red-faced girl who needs to sit down way too often. People think I’m lazy, that I eat too much, that I did this to myself. Even my mom, who I love with all my heart, constantly pushes me to “get outside.”  Don’t get me wrong, I love fresh air on a cool day. I love swimming, and going to concerts. But I have an illness that holds me back. I’ve spent the last 10 years being told that I just need to lose weight and I’ll feel better. Unfortunately, the whole time I’ve had this stupid tumor growing in my brain making it nearly impossible to keep from gaining weight, let alone losing it.  My mom came in today and told me I need to start exercising so that I’m okay for anesthesia, but I don’t think she understands that it literally hurts to be awake.  I know I should be working on being as healthy as possible before my surgery, but sleep is so much more appealing. That being said, I’m ready to hunker down and get healthy as surgery gets closer and even more so post-op

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